For Cabaret nights, private functions, launches, concerts, musical MCing, roving, festivals, fundraisers, night clubs, TV commercials and interviews.


Jacko moonwalks, breaks, pops, sings and dances. But his Hand has a wardrobe and a mind of its own!

Helvis the Pelvis

Helvis curls his lip, wiggles his pelvis, karate kicks and sings comical versions of his songs with all the classic moves.

Queen Helizabeth

For all right royal occasions, poetry nights, punk concert MCing, roving, launches, private functions, fundraisers, TV commercials and interviews etc.

Christopher Marlowe – Notorious Elizabethan Poet/Playwright

Notorious Elizabeth Poet/playwright who inspired Shakespeare
Marlowe is suitable for poetry nights and variety nights, Elizabethan nights, radio, etc

Dolly the blow-up sex doll

A runaway sex doll who’s sick of being screwed. She tells the story of her life and sings a naughty little ‘cuntry’ song.
Suitable for Punk nights, stand-up, poetry nights, private functions, band launches, radio, night clubs, etc

Captain Helchild – Depraved Pirate

Depraved poetic pirate of the swirling seas who often gets possessed by the ghost of his lunatic mother, Hellgranny.
For all occasions needing to be pirated – ADULT ONLY. Launches, boat rides, TV commercials, radio, festivals and carnivals, poetry nights, stand-up, night clubs.
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